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the real world, my job, bleh bleh bleh   
11:07pm 22/02/2007
  so yea im in the real world now. the world where your job matters. your performance matters. your punctuality your skill your attitude and most importantly your experience, all matter. and the last of the lot, i obviously, being a brand new nurse, lack. and now in my job i am being punished for being inexperienced. i am 'not improving' and will be terminated if 'things dont turn around'

this sounds horrible. this sounds like i didnt go to school. like i am not trying. like i dont care. like im a bad employee.

but to me it just sounds like i work for horrible people who arent examining the facts. the facts being that i am new, 3 weeks new to be exact, which is only 9 days of total working time. how distinguished can someone be, especially in an E.R. where you have to know something about everything, after only nine actual days? am i crazy? bonkers? looney? because i hate to be that 'woe-is-me' girl. that naive employee who thinks something is wrong with the system and not the source. i hate to be like that. but i keep running this scenario through my brain over and over and this is what i come up with one word: unfair. or unjust. or just plain, ridiculous.

if i didnt have a house payment id just tell them to eat the job for breakfast, shove it where the sun dont shine and walk out of there like the true rockstar i know that i am. but this is what brings me back to the real world. the having to go to work because of the whole bills and paying the bills thing.

so 5 1/2 years of college and 20,000 dollars of school loans later, i sit here. Having chosen this job over 2 other offers, and feeling miserably demeaned and belittled. feeling trapped.

i dont think i really like the real world that much....		  
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09:34pm 04/01/2007
  1.What did you do in 2006 that you'd never done before?

got married!

2. Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

i never do the resolution thing....why bother saying im going to do this when i know at heart, change is too hard for me to accomplish!

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

hmm nope.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

thank goodness no!

5. What countries did you visit?

vermont. haha anyone who doesnt watch friends doesnt understand the joke. back to the point-no no new countries.

6. What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006?

um i dont want anything. i have a husband and i now have a job but i didnt really want that in 2006 and dont really 'want' a job right now either.
7. What date(s) from 2006 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

aug. 12thm i got all married and stuff!! oh and graduation: dec 14. the last day of me + school forever and ever

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

married my soon to be sugar daddy and graduated from nursing school. yea buddy!


9. What was your biggest failure?
i guess i didnt try to do anything so technically i didnt fail. but i think not trying to do anything is a failure in itself. so i failed at that. yikes.


10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

sure was at the doctor's office a lot.

11. Favorite purchase?

a house-right at the tale end of 06. we got a wii for christmas but sold it on ebay and made a killing. so i guess that doesnt really count!!

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
like mike said, brit said bye bye bye to k fed. but she still said hello to him so i dont know if you can really celebrate ending a mistake and then dragging two kids into the middle of it? carrie underwood, shes just awesome. and donald trump for tellling off rosie o donnell. she just gets on my nerves

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

britney spears' crotch and c section scar was soooooo nasty nasty. i am depressed just thinking about it. my cousin is into drugs which is also depressing. jessica simpson getting divorced was actually quite depressing.

14. Where did most of your money go?

its on my finger, and in the bank. we dont really buy stupid stuff like purses and plasma tvs.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
wedding vegas baby vegas and getting finished with escuela.

16. What song will always remind you of 2006?

"god bless the broken road" rascal flatts ...wedding:)


17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder

happier
ii. thinner or fatter?

the same

iii. richer or poorer?

richer

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?

um studied for sure, and getting out of the apartment seeing my friends and family watched less tv and played more games. traveled...all the stuff that requires being frivalous with money.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

television watching. couch potatoing. chocolate eating. how did i answer the weight question "the same" if all i did was sit on the couch eating chocolate and watching tv? ....interesting.

22. Did you fall in love in 2006?

Been in love for a long long time

23. How many one-night stands?

i hate that phrase and the fact that it is a staple in the english language. thats why you people have syphillis.

24. What was your favorite TV program?

gotta be a greys anatomy...its my addiction. if they'd ever show a new episode.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

i really try not to hate anyone and try not to use that word (at least when it concerns people). i do of course hate our neighbors dog taht barks all day and night.

26. What was the best book you read?
harry potter every single one except number 2 was awesome.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
hmm...

28. What did you want and get?

a house a husband a degree a partridge in a pear tree...ok ok just the first 3

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
ice age 2, cars was cute, not the best though and talledega nights was pretty funny. its sad that those are my 'favorites'! it was a pretty horrid time for movies.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

23.....went to disney world the week before. i dont really think i cared. probably went out to dinner.
32.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

im satisfied. not worried about things i dont have or cant have. certainly nothing materialistic


33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006?
hmm gym clothes pj pants hoodies stolen from my sisters closet nursing scrubs. yea im pretty hip.

34. What kept you sane?
mikey celebrity gossip magazines frappacinos
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

love me some carrie underwood and of course totally love dr mc dreamy mc steamy and mc vet. addison is gorgeous and i love her too. dont mind alex carev too much and izzy is beautiful as well. oh i am such a greys fan. but come on they have an awesome and gorgeous cast.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?

i really hate politics. and hate when people talk about the issues because they all sound like asses.

37. Who was the best new person you met?

girls in my nursing program who really got me through the last few months which were so rough!		  
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11:07pm 11/12/2006
  i cant believe how much i love carrie underwood. if she had a concert mike and i would be going. and it wouldnt be all bad for him, she is easy on the eyes. so dont feel sorry for him having to take me to what can only be known as an amazing concert event.

i love carrie. girl c'mon over to the rupp arena and sing us a tune!

i cant believe how gay i sound

and i cant believe i own a house. double you tee eff. seriously. and i have a real job. which isnt awesome yet. maybe that will change when i start making monre money as soon as i can pass these state boards....boo to that.

either way i hate change. it freaks me out. and these changes are giant sized. jeepers.

oh well you all have to come see the new house! we dont have a lot of neighbors yet which means we dont have a lot of people we can disturb so we'll have to take advantage and party harty!

yea i know, mike and i, at most, will stay up until 1 am playing the Wii....not so much a wild crazed party. dare to dream my friend. dare to dream.

at the risk of sounding more gay and more cliche, and throwing an accidental rhyme in there?, i'm a sign off here.		  
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10:10pm 07/12/2006
  oh dear...i love bbq chick pizza by lean cuisine. its a grand stinking wonderful invention.

and secondly im bored. job doesnt start for a while (not complaining!) but anyway it all adds up to no daily plans. its half fabulous though. because no daily plans!! for the last three weeks i have managed to fill myt days with other errands and have-to-do things which are unfilling to say the least....anyway for now im debating on two different jobs. one with little babies that are brand new fragile and sick or the other, in the er. where the action never stops.

either way its night shift and im a morning person....how will that add up?????		  
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06:08pm 29/11/2006
 
mood: numb
each day i wake up thinking its a new day and things could just get better. magically. but theres no magic. things just get worse.		  
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08:22am 22/11/2006
  so i hungout with a friend a good ol friend last night and she said lets gossip. and im thinkin yea well i dont talk to anyone or know anything cool about anyone or anything. SO...basically if you want to talk about reese and ryan or britney and fedex, im ya girl! otherwise...im totally fresh out of the LOOP.
Heres what is going on in my 'loop':
1)so 20 days kids. TWENTY! i cant wait to put on that gorgeous cap andgown. yee haw.
2) Jamie Foxx just may be my new celebrity obsession
3)Scientology is the antichrist, slowly taking over the world. willsmith and jade pinkett have now crossed over.
4)i need a puppy
5)desperately need a puppy
6) not looking forward to putting on jeans on friday after days of eating!!!		  
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05:02pm 03/11/2006
  im boring i know but the post today is all about mike.

i love him so much!!

6 weeks of school to go....38 days!		  
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jerry-seinfeld-fat-pants   
07:15am 31/10/2006
  mikey and i are goign to see jerry seinfeld dec 9. how cool is that? im actually going to see him live! and it should be a lot of fun, certailny good laughs.

its something to look forward to. only one month and 14 days left of school. it might be true agony getting there. i have a way too much to do in the next 6 weeks, starting with me here not stuyding for my quiz tomorrow. yuck! its going to be a stretch, no time for anything. i forsee fatigue and weight gain in my immediate future.

guess i need to go shopping for jerry-seinfeld-fat-pants or i wont have anything to wear on dec 9 on account of ill be huge.

haha...so its halloween...and almost thanksgiving in 3 weeks...thats crazy. crazy good though. i love the holidays. not to sound hallmarky, but everything is better. the mornings are crisp the malls are glowing with lights lattes taste better (probably because of the gingerbread but hey whatever works!) and theres nothing better than snuggling in front of a christmas movie.

i cant wait! my first christmas as a married lady.

oh and i got a new job. in the neonatal intensive care unit at UK. I start jan 10 if i graduate. and i have to say if because i could fail. its possible. it just is! which sucks being that i have come so far...but if that happens ill have to pick myself back up and move on i guess. no biggie. im excited to not be in school anymore!@#$ caring for babies is scary. its someone's precious little life and lets face it you just cant eff it up. i am going to be working with one of my favorite people from school though and im so excidered about that. good company can make any situation sweeter.		  
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03:21pm 07/10/2006
  everyone always comments on how they are different and what makes them unique but we are all the same. we are allll the same.  
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08:39am 04/09/2006
  marriage...its almost been one month next tuesday...yay!

and i know i know, i am a newly wed and im supposed to be all happy and blah blah blah and i havent really been 'married' yet and everything else cynical that you people have to say, but i have to say i am so incredibly happy and lucky to be married to mike. i reccommend marrying someone you are best friends with. if you love someone and truly have a friendship i can't see the fault in wanting to marry that person. when you get to that point, you know each other's best qualities-what brings them out and really really what doesn't. you know what really sucks about them, but you love them anyway and maybe some of the bad qualities you wouldn't even change. because it makes them human. and it's so funny that people always talk about being too young to be married and having too much to do before they get married blah blah blah: because people who are married, at least i feel this way, feel like their life is just beginning, finally just beginning. and everyone else they dated every bar or party they went to was just a waste, just a filler, until they finally reached this point.

so anyone who thinks there is such thing as too young to be married, has not met the right person yet. yea im done babbling...just sick of hearing people say things that are stupid about marriage. nothing more!

so im awake cleaning and getting ready to study whilst the hub of mine sleeps away the day. ah i wouldnt change him. id like him to get up, but i wouldnt change him. ;)		  
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i still have an lj?   
08:35am 01/09/2006
  apparently i have an lj and apparently my husband is writing in his every once in a while....hes so great. i am just so blessed to have him in that way that makes you feel all warm chocolate chip cookie cozy. hes amazing.

so lately i have had more health problems related to my stupid eyes, which have no doubt given me problems since birth, and lately it just seems more and more they are causing me concern. i had all these tests run in feb to check neurological crap and they turned out ok which sent me jumping for joy and now my doctor is wanting them run again saying that just because they turned out ok once doesnt really mean anything. something could really be wrong with me. i hate to dwell or even think about it but of course its always in the back of my mind....so anyone who says prayers, say a prayer for me. say two prayers for me.

and thanks for reading my lj that i apparently still have!

woo hooooooooo!		  
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11:03pm 07/06/2006
  i was in the NICU today....neonatal i.c.u. at uk childrens hospital....

sooooo cool. its amazing to think these tiny little babies on ventilators and tube feedings and monitors and wires....grow up to become ok healthy huge fully grown people...

some of course were born with horrible anonmalies and we are so lucky...gossssssh. SO lucky. have you ever felt lucky to have nasal bones? eyeballs? moving legs?

yes well you should now.		  
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09:46am 26/05/2006
  many things on the agenda.

first of all, i miss greys....gosh that show is just stinking fantabulous.

second, tay tay hicks is not my american idol. he still looks like someone you hope doesnt show up to your wedding, or someone who sings at it, or an american idols dad...we live in a weird ol country.

third, i kicked ass on a test yesterday that many people failed. that feels so good. but i still have four more exams, one a week for the next four weeks, to royally screw up. (and i am sure i will and there wont be hopes for an A)...oh well.

and speaking of tests, labor and delivery is not a place i want to work at or a place ill EVER want to be a patient in. i love babies but staring at ....well you know, ALL day everyday...NO THANK YOU. and i do applaude those that have children but the pain the hours of labor the danger and the recovery....yikes. nothing about that is enticing. i have never witnessed a birth before but watching the educational 1980's video in class was as close as i want to be...unfortunately next week for a week straight ill be at Central Baptist where...(gulp) all the 'magic' happens.

why am i going to be a nurse! it doesnt get MORE grotesque!

for now, ill just stick to being an aunt-extraordinairre and maybe adopt some puppies and putting labor and delivery as my LAST choice for where I want to work post-grad.		  
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11:01pm 30/04/2006
  could greys anatomy be any more kick ass????!!!!!!!!  
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10:30pm 25/04/2006
  mike and i ate a jar of pickles.

....we are weird.

i stole his chair and he didnt realize it for like 10 minutes....

and this is what i have to write about.

???

i coudl talk about vegas....but its too far away. i coudl talk about how i wont lose weight before my wedding....but that is ecto depressing.

ps- vote for mcpheever. and chris.

pps- i love whitney houston...the music, not the crack fetish.		  
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01:42pm 23/04/2006
  HONEYMOON IN VEGAS: NO LONGER JUST A MOVIE

aug 13-18 caesars palace-here mr and mrs smith come!!!

sooooo excited:)		  
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10:05pm 09/04/2006
  i have known that poverty will strike the first four months of my marriage...but it has just recently annoyed me. its kind of coming down to being stressed about money or taking a honeymoon....considering my only summer vacation is one week until i get married, which for any bride is no vacation-(errands, fittings, finalizing last minute things, working out getting hair done nails done tanning not eating running and breathing luncheons nad rehearsal just to name some). so thinking about no weeklong vacation in the sun kind of creeps me out. the one week of rest in the sun somewhere was the only hope i had of "summer vacation" before my fall semester started....jeez. i just cant wait to be done with school. theres no way i would consider going back full time in the spring-thats just nuts.

mike and i are going to go to keenland and get our noses out of the books even if it scholastically kills us. i am going insane.

and im tired of being poooooor!

on another note mike and i are johnson centering lately...go us! got 4 months to not be fat for the wedding. project no turkey leg arms is well in motion.

4 months 3 days till i am wed! 8 months till i graduate! yayayayay!		  
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09:44pm 20/03/2006
  mike plays like seventeen poker tables at once now ....its pretty insane. im mesmorized by it.

i wish i could make money playing dr mario. id be rich. my goodness i lerve that game

i have a test tomorrow which i obviously dont care about being that im ljing in place of studying for it. and its a ten hour class. and i have slacked. boo honkey.

i just wanna move to the ville. i miss it so dearly. LEXINGTON SUCKS.

i still cant believe mike and i ever broke up. it hits me everyday and just amazes me. we are each others puzzle piece. clearly for that one year we were apart something was missing from each of us. of course we both had alcohol to cover it up...but id still say we werent ourselves. im so incredibly lucky to have him. hes amazing. you should be jealous.

;) lol...but hes so fab. i love you!		  
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12:04am 20/03/2006
  ten glorious days in the ville. gosh it was great. although two of those days were very scary and im still awaiting the results of those days...i guess we will see. im trying not to worry and have faith.

greys anatomy was so amazing tonight.

on another note i did the worst thing alive. i no called no showed on spring break (for many reasons that which i will not spill out onto lj, they were valid i assure you) anyway no called to my job which i really liked and needed and to my boss, whom i actually really liked as well. i feel like i screwed over my friends and did the most horrible professional thing ever. i suck. i feel like i should be punched. thats really the only logical punishment i see fit. i just cant believe i would do something like that. never in my life have i done something so selfish and rash and ridiculous. i feel like giant crap. im an awful person for doing that.

needless to say i dont have a job which in a surreal way feels horrible but liberating. the gift of time i have been given! yay! but ...like i said...at the expense of the sunglass hut.

I HATE MYSELF RIGHT NOW! im so mean! ahhhhh!

anyway...schools beginning again this week. boo to that. test on tues...havent studied. dont care. wish mike would win a fat tourney so we could live at home in the ville:(

his fam is so funny. its ridiculous. his mom is nagging him about his shoes being dirty and mikes goes "I licked them clean!" and his dad says "Well that makes em dirty then"...and i know that doenst sound hilarious but of course, it was coming from an old business man sitting in his recliner and looking up from his laptop...seriously...such a funny family. and AND oh wait! they are my family now too! i win! ha!		  
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02:56pm 07/03/2006
  alright so im just retarded to be mad about this but fat free butter spray? has as much fat as regular reduced fat margarine per tablespoon, thus explaining why it tastes so good.

6 grams of fat per tablespoon which after you cook with it (as i do) adds up! maybe after i stop using it ill lose a couple pounds. should be simple enough....except fat free butter by all other brands tastes like poo.

just thought i should share about those parkay lies!

LIES LIES LIES!		  
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gingerjenn
 
 
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